Monday, June 14, 2004

Boy Accidentally Defies ACE Code of Conduct

Gavin Darklighter, 16, is fearful that he will be kicked out of the American Coaster Enthusiasts due to an accidental breach of the ACE Code of Conduct.

"I can't believe I screwed up like that," said Darklighter. "I was hanging out at Hersheypark with some pals of mine. We'd had a good time riding the Comet and Great Bear and then Dan suggested we go to Sidewinder next. Well, I just naturally informed them that Sidewinder sucks c**k, like anyone with any common sense would. It just popped out."

He continued: "Well, that wouldn't have really been a problem, except Dan is the editor of my high school yearbook this year, and unfortunately that means I broke the rule where members of ACE aren't allowed to dislike any roller coaster, even if it chomps your ass and then comes back for seconds."

The rule to which Darklighter referred was Rule 4 of the ACE Code of Conduct, available on the ACE website snd sent by mail to ACErs each year when they receive their membership renewals three months late. In part, it states the following: "When interacting with the media, members are expected to speak enthusiastically about all parks and roller coasters."

"Damn," noted Darklighter. "I'm busted, ragging on a shitty coaster like that to the media. I'm positive I'll have my membership terminated."

In unrelated news, another ACE member, Wes Janson, 34, reported that he was also awaiting censure and possible expulsion from ACE, not to mention consideration for the dreaded Ban List, due to an article he posted on Coasterglobe two years ago where, in an otherwise positive review of Six Flags St. Louis, he opined that Mr. Freeze "licked."

--JCK

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