Red Sox Not Done Dealing
Although most baseball insiders figured the Boston Red Sox were done wheeling and dealing after their shocking multi-team trade that sent fan favorite and frequent All-Star Nomar Garciaparra to the Chicago Cubs and garnered them what Sox General Manager Theo Epstein delightedly called "the best defensive designated hitter available" and a "shortstop who is definitely warm and probably breathing," the team has continued to make moves at a frenzied pace.
This comes despite the difficulty teams have in making trades after July 31, since all players involved must now clear waivers.
The first player to go after "Nomah" was pitcher Derek Lowe, who was traded by the Sox to Sylvan Beach Amusement Park for their Galaxi coaster and a bumper car to be named later.
"Epstein can spin this any way he wants, but it really seems like the team has just given up," said Baseball America's Juan Manning. "Although this Galaxi is a well-maintained example of its type, and has the size and speed to be a versatile fit in most parks, it's too old to bring the heat like Lowe. Giving up good pitching for a well-travelled, solid, utility coaster makes no sense to me. And the throw-in of one bumper car won't even provide short-term relief for the Sox."
Manning stated that the Red Sox have several other major deals in the works, assuming all the necessary players clear waivers. "We predict some pretty major ones going down within the next week," he said. These reportedly include the Sox moving Tim Wakefield to Wild Adventures for a giraffe and a used Elvira simulator, Johnny Damon to the Braves for "a pocketful of change," and Pedro Martinez to the Yankees for "whatever."
[Editor's Note: In other sporting event news, the Bengals visit Boardwalk & Baseball and Claude Mabillard is traded.]