Wednesday, October 01, 2003

Assistant Editor Notches Really Crummy 250th

The Assistant Editor and frequent ARN&R writer JCK ended up having an amazingly crappy coaster as his 250th, sources tell us. Aside from having to carry the red mark of shame for managing to ride such a bad coaster on an important even number, JCK is reputedly worried about whether he will be able to maintain his standing in the American Coaster Enthusiasts, what with their Brute Squad making the rounds disciplining people left and right.

"The incident happened this weekend," a flustered JCK said, furtively glancing left and right to keep an eye out for the Brute Squad. The Editor-in-Chief and Supreme Benevolent Leader for Life and I went to Morey's Piers this weekend, and at some point I remembered that I had been on 246 coasters and would likely hit the big 250 at some point during the day. But then we walked down the boardwalk after parking, and we came first to the pier with Great White. I was so excited to ride a custom CCI woodie that I didn't think to insist we run all the way down to the other piers first so I could rack up some s*it carni portables first and make Great White my 250th. Damn me for rushing to the good coaster first!"

JCK added that "having Great Nor'easter as my 250th will be a taint that will live with me forever. As will the migraines and the crippled back I suffered during my ride on that thing."

An ACE Executive Junta member who asked not to be named stated that "although having a crap coaster as an important number in one's count is not officially covered in the Almighty ACE Code of Commandments, it is suspicious behavior that we'll be looking into."