Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Corrections

ARN&R willingly corrects factual errors, typographical mistakes, and any inaccuracies in our rumor reporting made on our website. If you think we have made an error in a story, and sincerely believe we give a shit, please email us promptly at errorsupportcrew_main69@absolutelyreliable.com.

A recent ARN&R article described the new custom installation of a Vekoma Boomerang at Visionland. Numerous Southern readers indicated to us that they were insulted by our handling of this news. After intricately researching our information a second time, we are able to report that, indeed, we forgot to mention that, not only will the ride feature a porch and be put up on blocks, it will also feature several large hound dogs laying around on it. Additionally, the ride will feature a helpful banner detailing the proud history of the South. ARN&R regrets these omissions.

In another recent story, ARN&R broke the exciting news that the Voice of Kennywood would be creating the spoken role of General Grievous in the next Star Wars film. While we stand behind this information and the sources who reported it to us, we neglected to mention that "General Grievous" is one of the dumbest names a movie character has ever had. ARN&R apologizes for this error.

Finally, another ARN&R story suggested that ACE is full of morons who regularly piss off amusement parks with their loutish and rude behavior, unreasonable demands, and farting. This was just a typo. We regret the inconvenience.

--JCK