Friday, June 18, 2004

KKK Members Protest Gay Days by Publicly F*cking Animals

Following a completely unsuccessful attempt, through on-site protest, to intimidate homosexuals into not attending the unofficial Gay Day at Dollywood park a few weeks back, the Ku Klux Klan is trying a new strategy in its quest to promote hatred and violence: f*cking barnyard animals.

"Whoo-weee!" shouted lifelong KKK member Billy Joe Pigsqueal, 38, as he sodomized a hapless goat outside of Six Flags Over Georgia, where the group was protesting a Gay Day being held at that park. "Take that! That'll show you homos we don' need yer kind at amusement parks!"

Pigsqueal was unable to inform ARN&R why, precisely, a bunch of inbred assholes giving some rough love to chickens and cows would have any effect on whether anyone decided to visit an amusement park.

"We're gonna keep on f*ckin' us some goats and pigs until the queers stop havin' their sinful Gay Days," noted Joe Don Bob “Strom” Thurmond, 95, a seventy-year KKK member famous for suing the makers of Deliverance for portraying him in an unfavorable light during the "Dueling Banjos" scene in that film. "We'll be protestin' just like this at every park that lets these homos in."

Thurmond was in the midst of a predictably idiotic rant about how white people are an oppressed minority in the US, when he was surprisingly thrown to the ground and raped by an angry steer that had broken loose from its holding pen. Despite this setback, the surviving hate club members assure ARN&R that they will continue having passionate sex with fowl and hogs until the world recognizes the supremacy of the Aryan race and/or gays stop going to theme parks.

--JCK

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