Monday, January 03, 2005

Local Enthusiast Still Unaware that "Tsunami Relief Fund" is Not Referring to Clementon Park Sale

Local enthusiast Byron Mathews, who goes by the name "B&M4eVaH" on the local coaster fan forum "Scream Network," was until this morning unaware that the thread entitled "Tsunami Relief Fund" was referring to the deadly Tsunami waves that have killed more then 130,000 people, and not the "For Sale" listing of Clementon Park and their coaster, Tsunami, in the Wall Street Journal.

Apparently Mathews, 30, assumed that the thread appealing to enthusiasts to donate to their local Red Cross concerned Tsunami the roller coaster, and then never bothered to open the thread. "I just figured some enthusiasts were pooling some money together to save the coaster in case someone bought Clementon who wanted to put up condos or something," Byron explained to ARN&R.

How Mathews, however, has not actually heard of a news event that has captured global television and newspapers is a phenomenon known by sociologists as "Assburgia," where a human being's obsession with one particular hobby dwarfs their ability to be aware of any basic realities going on in the world around them.

When told of the massive disaster, Mathews was reported to exclaim, "Geesh!" and then inquired if any coasters were damaged in the disaster.


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