Friday, August 22, 2003

Kings Island to Replace Water Park with Water Sports Fetish Section

Many stories have reported the fact that Parmount's Kings Island will be removing its Water Works water park after this season. Most speculation has focused on a bigger water park taking its place, in particular noting publicist comments suggesting that patrons bring their swimsuits.

But ARN&R can now exclusively report that those reports are wrong, or at least misguided. In fact, PKI will be replacing the entire section with a water park...but a water park of a different kind. Called "Golden Showers Lagoon," the 20-acre section of the park will be entirely dedicated to "water sports" fetishists -- those for whom urination and all of its variants are arousing.

"This is really an underserved market in the Cincinnati area," said Michael Poland, park spokesman. "If it goes well, we're thinking about retheming a lot of the park to other fetishes. Like maybe an inverted coaster with an area below it for foot fetishists to really get a good look at the riders' feet. We like to think outside the box here."

The equipment for the new park will be provided by NBGS International of New Braunfel's, Texas, and of Tijuana, Mexico. Patrons will be required to shower before and after leaving Golden Showers Lagoon and proper identification will be required.