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Due to Typo, Paramount Parks Celebrate Columbo Day

The word came out from corporate headquarters: Paramount Parks were to celebrate Columbus Day in grand style, with appropriate theming and costumed characters.

But, due to an unfortunate typographical error in the memorandum, all of the Paramount parks around the country instead celebrated the coolest of all detectives, Columbo. Peter Falk impersonators got calls for work like they haven't gotten for years, cigars and trenchcoats were sold out in local stores, and visitors had an unusual day at the park.

"I was just in line for Hypersonic when this kid -- couldn't have been more than eighteen -- comes up to me. He's got his tie loosened, his collar sorta half up, and a trenchcoat. And that cigar -- what was up with that?" asked Barbara Piccolo, a guest at Paramount Kings Island this morning who had the day off from her government job. "And he starts grilling me like I'm a murder suspect or something and talking in this weird gravelly voice. They've got a funny way of celebrating Columbus Day here."

(Editor's Note: Yes, two old detective show-themed articles in a row. Go figure.)