Friday, June 06, 2003

ARN&R Exclusive: Simon Cowell Vomits On World Class Coaster

For the acid-tongued judge on Fox's American Idol, the hits keep on coming, but not on Busch Gardens' Apollo's Chariot. Simon Cowell, host of the upcoming CBS feature Cupid, reportedly wanted to keep in the public light.

"I figured, if Fabio could extend his pathetic career by a few minutes by getting hit by a bird on a coaster, so could I," said Cowell in an exclusive interview with ARN&R, in which he declared that he would try to repeat Fabio's feat. After several (flawed) attempts at getting hit in the face by a bird, the speed and power of the B&M floorless coaster got the best of him and Simon Cowell vomited uncontrollably, while others aboard the ‘Chariot' apparently remained unconcerned and downright bored.

"I found the total experience to be quite nauseating, to say the least," stated Cowell, who can be seen in the ARN&R exclusive photograph sitting next to his body guard and public relations managers. "If I had to do it all over again, I would rather a fan toss a bird directly in my path the first go round. It is also quite evident that someone paid entirely too much for an on ride photo at my expense and should purchase an ARN&R frame to go along with their evildoing."


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