Absolutely Reliable News & Rumors.

Let Them Eat Cake and Cupcakes and Absolutely Nothing Else

This week's Site O' the Weak is a very special one to all of us here at AbsolutelyReliableTowers, due in no small part to the fact that a couple of us got to witness the masses of humanity that are the Jersey Shore over the weekend. One park we sadly did not get to visit is Playland's Castaway Cove in lovely and scenic Ocean City, New Jersey.

First of all, the website for Playland's Castaway Cove is extremely popular. How popular? Hard to say, but we'll note that the front page does say that "This page has been seen by visitors." Congratulations, Playland's Castaway Cove! We're sure we'll see you at next year's Webbys!

If you're wanting to visit, just pop over to the page listing the hours of operation, and, um, travel back in time back to May or June, as the park has evidently been closed since then.

And good news for parents! You can have your child's birthday party at Playland's Castaway Cove! But be sure to drink a full day's supply of beverages beforehand, and ensure that no diabetic kids are coming, because cake and cupcakes are allowed, but "No other food or beverage items are permitted!!" No soup for you, and nothing less than eighty percent sugar!

So, thanks, Playland's Castaway Cove! Your utter lack of updates and transparent hostility to anyone hoping to make their child's birthday enjoyable make you this week's ARN&R Site O' the Weak!