Absolutely Reliable News & Rumors.

Turkmen Honing In On ARN&R Turf

Why, yes, we have been sort of quiet. Can you blame us when stories like this one exist? Why do we need to exist (don't answer that) when an actual news story includes this?

ASHGABAT, Turkmenistan: Authoritarian leader Saparmurat Niyazov on Friday formally opened an amusement park named after him.

We bow down to you, Saparmurat Nyazov.