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Mullet Proclaimed Official Hairstyle Of Kennywood Park

Jerome Gibas, vice-president and general manager of Kennywood Park, has proclaimed the mullet to be the official hairstyle of the 105-year-old traditional amusement park located in West Mifflin, Pennsylvania.

In an exclusive interview with ARN&R, Mr. Gibas revealed why Kennywood decided to magnify the mullet to "super-style" status.

"The mullet is very special to Pittsburgh area residents," stated Jerome. "What hairstyle could better exemplify the small town look and feel of a wonderful classic amusement park like Kennywood? Before we settled on the mullet, we had considered immortalizing other hairstyles, like the flattop or the kinky perm, but none of the others seemed to reach out to us the way that that the mullet did. The mullet is such an attractive and versatile haircut. It looks good on men. It looks good on women. Hell, it even looks good on children. We are truly honored to feature the mullet as the official hairstyle of Kennywood Park."

In celebration of Kennywood's official new "do," the park will feature "Mullet Mark Down Days" every Thursday in July and August. All guests wearing a mullet hairdo will get half-price admissions to the park on those days. As a bonus, any guest with a mullet and a rat-tail will get the half-price admission, plus they'll get a coupon good for half off the purchase of Kennywood's latest delicious snack bar confection, the deep fried chocolate covered white fudge macadamia nut brownie.

Six Flags Kentucky Kingdom is reportedly considering legal action to prevent Kennywood from advertising itself as the Mullet Capital of the Amusement World. According to sources, SFKK contends that such a claim would be false advertising given the daily volume and quality of mullets at that park.

UPDATE: Our top-secret news sources recently informed us that 2004 will be "The Year Of The Mullet" at Kennywood Park. There will be special mullet-related shows and events happening all season long like the "Mullet Madness Musical Revue" and "The 1st Annual Miss Mullet" competition. The most exciting news of all, however, is that Kennywood has contracted with the Sally Corporation to develop a new custom interactive dark ride called the "Mighty Amazing Mullet Ride." Passengers will be armed with "interactive scissors" and will attempt to cut their way through mountains of hair in an effort to sculpt the perfect mullet.

--JWS