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Paramount's Ride Survey Offers Tough Choices

For those lucky enough to take Paramount's new ride survey, a tough choice had been laid before them. Theme a ride around the highly popular television show and movie franchise "The Addams Family," known and loved by families across America, or around a mediocre heist movie with Markie Mark called the "Italian Job," known and loved by my gay friend George.

Paramount hopes to follow this survey with another which will ask parkgoers to choose between two brand new possible menu selections: a spicy chicken sandwich or a hot piece of dog sh*t.

--MOS

[Editor's Note: Perhaps fearing a taunting article from ARN&R, or, far more likely, just for reasons completely unrelated to us, Paramount has recently removed the actual survey from its website.]